HIBUKI Start Hugging: It’s Worth More Than a Thousand Words

Hibuki is a powerful therapeutic tool that reduces anxiety and promotes emotional healing.

By Dr. Shai Hen Gal
Published on Mako, January 21, 2025, at 10:28

These days, and after the year we've had, stress and anxiety have risen among both children and adults. Studies show that hugs affect our hormonal system: they reduce anxiety and increase the levels of endorphins that provide feelings of pleasure and well-being. "Don't skimp on hugs – they are free, natural, and have much more impact than we think."

On Sunday, along with all of Israel, we watched the emotional moments that most clearly demonstrated the immense power of hugs: three hostages—Romi Gonen, Doron Steinbrecher, and Emily Demari—returned to Israel after 471 days in captivity. Before the emotional reunion with their families, before the interrogations and discussions, the mental health professionals waiting for them enveloped them in warm hugs. The first hug, after more than a year of captivity, said it all: "You’ve come home, you’re safe, we’re here for you."

As a psychologist who researches and treats trauma, I know that this was not just a spontaneous hug—it was a calculated therapeutic act. A hug is much more than a mere gesture of affection; it’s a therapeutic tool, especially in moments of crisis and trauma. Biologically, a hug has an immediate effect on our hormone system: it increases the secretion of oxytocin, which reduces anxiety and stress, raises endorphin levels that provide feelings of pleasure and well-being, and simultaneously lowers cortisol levels—the stress hormone. All of this happens within seconds of warm human contact.

The science behind the power of a hug is fascinating. In a groundbreaking study from 1965, researcher Harry Harlow gave baby monkeys a choice: a "mother" made of wire that provided food, or a soft, hugging "mother" with no food. The results were clear—the monkeys preferred the hug over food, and only when they were hungry did they briefly leave the "mother" to eat and then immediately return. This study highlights the importance of hugging for infants, children, and teenagers. A hug is even more important than nourishment.

"Hibuki Intervention"

The "Hibuki Intervention" was developed during the Second Lebanon War by me, together with the late Prof. Avi Shadé and Dr. Flora Mor. I was looking for a treatment to calm the post-traumas and anxieties of thousands of children evacuated from the north. In a shop at Tel Aviv University, I saw, in one of the hidden corners, a sad-eyed dog doll with long arms that could be attached. I asked the storekeeper how much it cost, and he told me no one wanted it because of the deep sadness in its eyes. Later, the importer gave us hundreds of these dolls for free, for the same reason. We initiated a treatment where the child takes care of "Hibuki" and calms it down. We trained special therapists on the subject, and the success was immediate.

In 2008, following the war, I conducted a study that followed 600 children who experienced the Second Lebanon War and were treated using the "Hibuki Intervention." Half of them received the Hibuki Intervention—the treatment we developed, along with therapeutic meetings and parent guidance; the other half were treated without the doll. The results showed that the more the child hugged the doll and took care of it, the more their anxiety and distress significantly decreased. "Hibuki Intervention" proved to be the most effective and rapid treatment for anxiety and post-trauma in children.

Since then, the intervention has proven itself worldwide. Over 150,000 children around the world have used this method to cope with traumatic events. Here in Israel, since the outbreak of the Iron Swords war, we have established a professional volunteer team at the "T.L.M." association of "Amal and Beyond" and treated more than 10,000 children. We saw the power of the hug in the children of kidnapped families, children evacuated from Gaza border communities, and children of fallen IDF soldiers. Again and again, we saw that the hug—whether from a parent, a therapist, or even the Hibuki doll—was often the most significant step toward emotional recovery.

Since the sirens covered the entire country, anxieties became a part of life for nearly every family in Israel. Therefore, over the past year, several authorities—such as Tel Aviv, Ashkelon, Nahariya, and Nazareth—have adopted the method, and together we established free Hibuki Intervention centers for their residents.

A comprehensive Dutch study conducted recently revealed additional interesting insights: touch in the head and face area is more calming than in other parts of the body, and short hugs throughout the day are more effective than one long hug. This is especially true when talking about children who have experienced trauma—the hug should come before words, before questions, before attempts to understand and process.

As we approach the end, and in honor of International Hugging Day, which is celebrated today with an emotional and chilling timing, here’s my prescription for hugs. Recommended for all ages:

• Prefer several short hugs during the day over one long hug.
• Hug before you speak, especially in moments of distress.
• Let the child lead the duration and intensity of the hug.
• Remember, a hug can say "I’m here for you" more than a thousand words.
• Don’t skimp on hugs—they’re free, natural, and have a much greater impact than we think.

These days, as we hope for the return of all the hostages, I am reminded again and again of the healing power of a hug. Sometimes, just like we saw the day before yesterday, one hug can be the beginning of a long healing journey. Since the war broke out, I’ve been making an effort to bring the Hibuki Intervention to as many children as possible who need it. I’ve seen firsthand the incredible effects of "Hibuki" on children. I hope that as many kidnapped children as possible will soon return to the warm embrace of their families, healthy, whole, and loved.

The author is the chief psychologist of the "Amal and Beyond" group and the developer of the "HIBUKI Intervention."